i found myself in the pages of book...

Why I like the Twilight Saga…

(For the sake of ease…I am going to refer to The Twilight Saga and simply Twilight…hoping for the realization I mean the entire story.)

I have heard so many disgruntled and discouraging things about the Twilight Saga that it makes me want to yell, “Get a grip!  Its just a story…can’t a girl like a fairytale ending any more?!”

I have a hard time comparing Twilight with other books…not that I don’t reflect on all the different stories I have read…for they do make me who I am as a reader and book adventurer.  But the trickiness in comparing books is just the same as comparing people…each is unique and intriguing because the author is telling their own story.  Each character may make me think for a moment of someone else, but then of course they do…we are the sum total of our influences.  It is who I am as a person and my experiences that make me filter and view each story in its own way.

I enjoyed Twilight because I felt myself finally being described as a character in a book.  I have read and enjoyed many female characters and wanted to be each one as I read.  I wanted to be the quirky orphan girl who became an author and won the heart of the cute boy next door like Lucy Maud Montgomery’s, Anne of Green Gables did, where being smart was better than being pretty.  I wanted to be as clever, smart and as brave as J.K Rowling’s, Hermione Granger.  I have seen myself as a bridge between my two worlds like Hari in Robin McKinley’s “Blue Sword.”  Or having the strength and purity of Éowyn in Tolkien’s stories, or the drive to survive like, Katniss in Suzanne Collin’s Hunger Games.  There are so many leading ladies I want to be but until Twilight I never really felt like one of them.  I could aspire to be like them, but really I am not that kind of hero.  I will never lead a war.  I am not, to the casual observer, a fighter or an instigator.  I am not amazingly bold or brave, although I do share the ideals they each inspire; I am more like Bella.

I have never been a fan of vampire stories and actually had no intention of reading Twilight.  But two of my best friends each said at different moments, “Have you read Twilight?  Because when I read it, I thought of you.” 

One friend saying this…ok maybe, but two--So I picked up the books and read them.  And I was in agreement with my two friends, they were right.  I saw myself.  I like Bella because I understand her.  I feel her.  I don’t find her weak but instead I find her human and normal and a quiet, introverted observer who wants to love the people important to her and protect them, even if it means self-sacrifice.  Oh wait…am I talking about Twilight?!

I saw a poster on Pinterest that showed images of Katniss, Princess Leia, Hermione Granger, and Bella Swan.  The first three had captions like: I started a rebellion, I lead and army, and I fought a dark lord; but Bella’s caption was “I got married.” And then it said, “Girls, choose your role model wisely.”  And I thought to myself…that’s crap.  I was going to just ignore it but I kept fuming…So I made a different one and added Éowyn as well.  I captioned Éowyn with “I killed a witch king.” And I changed Bella’s to say, “I stopped a war.”  And topped it all off with, ”I am woman, hear me roar.”  I mean really, why do that?  If you can’t say something nice…why say it at all.  (What about Aurora?!  She slept through everything!)  So here I am justifying a character in a book.  Why?  Because really, deep down I am justifying myself. Yep, pure self-preservation.

I read the other books and wanted to be those leading ladies, but when I read Stephenie Meyer’s descriptions of Bella, I felt like someone had taken covert videos and notes from inside my own head.  While as a girl I always wanted to be Princess Leia, but I never had that type A personality.  I understood Bella not wanting to really even be noticed, not wanting a big birthday party because she didn’t like being the center of attention.  I am the girl who never minded being alone because I liked actually being on my own.  Not to shun people, but just needing alone time.

I remember one of my friends saying Bella’s character was so weak and boring and I remember thinking…what must you think of me?  Not that I am Bella, but rather every word Stephenie wrote I understood to my very core.  What is wrong with hurting so bad that you feel a hole inside your chest that nothing can really heal it?  What is so abnormal about crying over the things that ache and holding your mind together by being around a friend who lightens some of the darkness.  And what is wrong with eventually knowing your super power is simply shielding yourself.  And in fact, it is a shield so strong you can project it beyond yourself to protect every person you love.  That unlike the movie, nothing bad can really happen in the end because of your gift. (Although in the film, they do take it all back.)  I loved that Bella’s gift wasn’t being a fighter in the battle strength-wise, but rather she was able to stop the fight before it even started.

So beyond Bella and understanding her melancholy mind, I love that really in the end she gets to spend eternity with the one she loves.  She does get married.  She does wait until marriage to sleep with her husband (although it is more thanks to Edward than to Bella in the restraint department). She does bridge the gap between her two families and between races.  I love the fairytale.  In the end Bella gets to finally feel like she was always meant to be…I find my own eternity in the story.  That eventually I will reach the life I was made for.  I will reach eternity and spend that eternity in the presences of God.  Twilight is for the quiet girls who just want to blend into the background and yet know deep down they are meant for more.  It is for the fairytale ending without the fight.  Where the story is more about the way you feel and love then it is about the epic war.  I loved the bits of poetic imagery that last after reading these books.   So thank you to Stephenie Meyer for creating a lady hero who is more like me…

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Well I also have to add a bit of a tribute to some of my favorite authors…I love Tolkien’s ability to weave an epic tale.  He was a bard in the truest sense of the word.  I have to put this line in, “…to scatter in tattered shreds over the marshes before Mirkwood.” (I love the way it rolls off my tongue and that isn’t even one of the best known.) JK Rowling has captured my imagination like few other fantasy writers, from the enchanted ceiling and Hagrid, to the potion making and spell casting, to flying on brooms and Hippogriffs and Thestrals and disapparating (I had to check the spelling on most of those words!!!) … I laugh and cry and then, whenever reading about Umbridge, I want to throw the book across the room.  And while I am a fan of Suzanne Collins it is not for the Hunger Games, but rather her first series The Underland Chronicles. 

“Fly you high.”

Her writing style is something I enjoy, she sweeps you into a world beyond home, on the wings of bats and in the minds of rats.  Although I had a hard time with the whole idea of the Hunger Games, I found them just too harsh and mean for my taste; like the inspiration behind them of the reality show Survivor and the ongoing war (mean people just…suck).  Yet, despite its harshness I was captured and couldn’t stop reading.  Peeta was the best of heroes.  I love Robin McKinley and Patricia A. Mckillip, A Tale of Two Cities and Emperor of Ocean Park, Jane Austen and John Grisham.  I could name so many other authors and stories I read over and over again…but there is no reason to.  Now, all I am saying is I love a good story with characters I understand and believe in.  That is why I like Twilight… and so many others.