autumn's riegn...

Today was in shades of grey until my drive home.  I decided to take the slow back way home today avoiding the crazy..."oh no its raining in Portland!" traffic and i was given a gift...God became the wizard of my Oz...

the world has turned to grey...
like a black and white image the scape is before me
grey sky and clouds in perfect levels of neutral tonality.
there is even a metallic quality to the image before my eyes.
but if i just look further...and see what is beyond the wet windshield
the world transforms around me.
like Dorothy walking out of Kansas and into Oz...
the scene has all the wonder and magic of color.
scarlet leaves wave from treetops
yellow and orange stir around me
even the greens appear brighter today...
and why?

all because of shades of grey...
the muted, neutral tones have set color on fire
burning vivid on the scene of fall
brandishing their flags of vibrant hue
let the autumn riegn...
let autumn in all her glory rain...

freedom song...

I was too young to have experienced the civil rights movement in America, but i am fascinated by the history and on going battles for freedom.  Recently I finished reading, "The Help," watching, "Catch a Fire," and watching, "Grilled Cheesus" one of the latest Glee episodes and you might wonder why these stories are so interwoven in my head.  They all carry with them a haunting to be free.  Each in their own testimonial power made tears trace down my cheeks.  The desire and pain seamlessly impassioned to burn until something must be done.  The wreckage left by so many thoughtless acts against people.  When did being unique or different drive us from love and the equality of all being the flesh and blood image of God?  I was so taken in by the pain and truthfulness of each story, their epic tales of trying to find freedom...


they sing of freedom they want to see...
they sing of freedom beyond their borders...
they sing for freedom beyond your limits...
oh how they sing...

freedom come to me...
oh freedom...
why won't you set us free...
freedom...
yes deliver me...
why can't we all just be free?

they cry for freedom from your cold stare...
they cry for freedom from broken homes...
they cry for freedom from the bullet's reach...
they cry for freedom from all your lies...
oh how they cry...

freedom come to me...
oh freedom...
why won't you set us free...
freedom...
yes deliver me...
why can't we all be free?

they fight for freedom with spoken words...
they fight for freedom with truths out loud...
they fight for freedom with flesh and blood...
they fight for freedom with a dream...
oh how they fight...
yes how they fight...

freedom come to me...
oh freedom...
why won't you set us free...
freedom...
yes deliver me...
why can't we all just be free?

we rise our voice for freedom...
all together now...
shout for freedom...
won't you raise your voice...
for freedom...
the whole earth cries...
for freedom...
devil you hold no power...
we will be free...

Today was an amazing color display. The sky was every shade of grey...that menacing gorgeous blue-grey that I would paint my world with.  It was breathtaking.  So many layers, so many shades; the dark and menacing charcoal tinged with blue, all the way to a perfect patch of blue rimmed in fluffy clouds of white.   As the sun passed through the darkness of color it painted a perfect rainbow...full arch. If you stared hard enough I am sure there could have been leprechauns with two pots of gold.

percussion piano...

I hear the rain pattering... playing the leaves like a percussion piano...each leaf...roof...window is a new key in the beautiful melody of fall.

The scents boil up and burst. Fresh damp earth and the musk of dust dying under each new drop.

The world covered over by a blanket of glass that shines a thousand ripples of light from under lamp post and passing cars.

All nature breaths in the air of new awakenings, like it has been given new life...in the gentle caress of rain...

that which can stir my soul...

music...and the rhythm and beat that can make me sing, dance or just be.  An awe inspiring track that seeps me through the beauty of a film, an epic battle or a lovers tryst.  Music that makes my body move.  Sultry or sweet, sensual or acrobatic.  I love music that takes me on a journey. When the lyrics are poetry or pure story, when I know what will come before it takes place. Music and all it offers to my soul...

dance...
the masterpiece of choreographer and dancer. A blend of music and motion.  It can make me laugh or cry or any other range of emotion across a sliding scale.  I feel like i can fall or fly.  Dance stirs something deep inside of me and makes me want to reach out and take it...

fire...is also one of those haunting things.  The all consuming flames, dancing and smoldering.  The colors blending and flickering, ever-moving, ever-changing as they burn what ever they feed on...

water...
the ocean and its power and depth, A spring and it light-hearted gurgling play.  A river ever moving and flowing.  The lake, its majestic reflection of earth and sky.  The cool touch and moist kiss of water on skin.  On the surface of the deep, the ebb and tide of movement and life...

Milton and my own: paradise lost...

I fell in love with this quotation from Milton's Paradise Lost: Book I...

Sing, Heav'nly Muse
I now invoke thine aid...
Thou, O Spirit, that does prefer
Before all Temples the pure and upright heart,
Instruct me, for Thou knowest; Thou from the first
Was present, and, with mighty wings outspread,
Dovelike sat brooding on the vast Abyss...
What is dark in me
Illumine; what is low, raise and support.


His words inspired my own...

My God, the only God, He who stood before the abyss
and felt the call to create stir.
You God, my God whom called forth the light
from beyond the edge, You whom spoke and it was.
Please draw me upon the wings of the morning and
make my darkness light.  Shine your Spirit into the depths
of my fears and scatter them.
Bring my creative passion under your control
and ignite it.
Make me burn with your wondrous light!

the prayer of Saint Francis of Assisi...

Lord, make me an instrument of your peace.
Where there is hatred, let me sow love.
where there is injury, pardon; where there is discord, union;
where there is doubt, faith; where there is dispair, hope;
where there is darkness, light; where there is sadness, joy.
Grant that we may not so much seek to be consoled as to console;
to be loved as to love.
For it is in giving that we receive;
it is in pardoning that we are pardoned
and it is in dying that we are born
to eternal life.

spiced raspberries...

The luxuries of home...I sit here outside in the sun with a cool autumn breeze rustling all the branches and leaves around me.  The sunlight dancing shadows across my page as my pen begins to write.  In this moment I know I made the right choice to come home.  I came for solace and reflection.  I came to have a heart to heart away from my apartment, away from my job, away from the little daily time consuming distractions.

Familiar sounds and sights assail me.  Like the 3 o'clock bugle from the mill, signifying shift change...and knowing as a kid, it meant school was almost out.

I am overwhelmed by the beauty here.  The colors are dancing ripples of green and gold.  The passing of white and grey across the bluest sky-blue sky.  I close my eyes and I can still see the brightness of sunshine and feel it warming the chill from my skin...from my heart...from my mind...it has set my soul free.

I smell the dampness of yesterday's rain, mixed with the sweet spice of the raspberry bushes.  I can catch remnants of our bonfire from two nights ago and breathe in the scent of pine trees and earth.

The grass is all wild from rain and the absence of a mower.  Its green is deep and lush, you can almost taste it.

Birch leaves in the wind sound like the sequins on a showgirl's gown. Tapping and clicking together, shimmering in the fading afternoon light.

The gentle hum of crickets has already begun.  And the faint sounds of tree frogs croaking from their hidden places.

As the sun dips behind a cloud I begin to feel the bite of winter on the air. Like drinking cold, clear water from a spring.  The edge where you begin to ache, but not just yet...

the melancholy tirades of my heart...

I watch sunlight shimmer, dappling the ground with spots of light through leaves. Glowing golden and green. The ground smelling of damp earth and fresh cut grass. Breathe deeply, drawing in the warm moist air.  These are the days...

Fire dancing in the hearth, the cold crisp air flows through the window.  The sounds of wind rustling through the trees rattling against the siding.  Shadows dance across moon lit grass.  These are the nights...

Drawing in my breath with eyes closed. Willing the restless ache to pass. The rise and fall of my chest as each new breath comes and a shudder racks my body.  Tears begin to streak salt paths down my cheek.  Day or night the ache and wondering remains. These are the cries of my heart...